trendy says: Jack, I’m very disappointed that you didn’t cover Micha Barton’s recent DUI arrest. I mean, she didn’t even just get caught walking across the street, and I know you hate that kinda boring tripe. Long live the Empire!
Jack says: Micha Barton’s never really done anything for me so admittedly I just kind of ignored her yesterday in between eating a two week old donut and ranting about the scent of Britney Spears. She’s like Bai Ling, I only ever seem to hear about her when her nipple escapes from her top or something. Plus, she confused me with a mugshot that looked almost exactly like the Lindsay Lohan mugshot, to the point where I glanced over it yesterday and just assumed Lohan fell off the wagon. The same half smile. The coy look of the eyes. Like she’s auditioning for a role in a porno.
For some odd reason however, I get this Macaulay Culkin feel from the picture after looking at it for awhile. Seriously, focus on the eyes. Now shorten the hair considerably in your head. That’s flipping Macaulay Culkin right there.
