No, not crap crap. That would be disgusting.
The big story today is that actress Lucy Liu likes to carry a wooden box around with her and place random objects inside to keep / look at / pray to / eat.
“So far today I’ve picked up a pez dispenser, a wooden stick, and John McCain’s false teeth,” Lucy told a news reporter for X-16. She then continued on down the street, stopping only to scrape some old chewing gum off the sidewalk.
Rumors that the police are currently investigating Lucy Liu in connection to the apparent disappearance of Charlie’s Angels co-star Drew Barrymore are completely unfounded at this time. A reporter who’s name we promised not to reveal (Brad Witt) told us of the latest gossip in Hollywood:
“We haven’t seen Drew Barrymore in Hollywood in quite some time. She’s just sort of dropped off the face of the earth, and no one has any idea where she is,” our mystery reporter (Brad Witt) says. “And no one really knows who to ask because you can never keep up with who she’s dating. It’s gotten to the point where investigators are just asking random people she could possibly be dating if they’ve seen her. Justin Long, George Clooney, Jodie Foster. Now, the new theory is that Lucy Liu may have “collected” her.
