Country music legend and actress Dolly Parton will be donating her famous bosom to various fan conventions over the next month as a thank you to fans, but also as a thank you to the pair itself.
My breasts have truly served me well. They’ve supported me throughout the years and have always been the best of friends to me, through the good times and the bad. I mean, they’re always there, never leaving, and I value that kind of loyalty.
Fans will be able to gawk, stare, pose for pictures and get a personalized autograph from their favorite boob. Yes, they do in fact have distinct personalities, as Dolly explained to USuxxors.com’s own breast expert Gal Val.
The left one is Shock. She can be a little fussy sometimes like a scalded dog but she’s a good natured girl. The right one is Awe, because she usually gets people goin’ AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW ain’t she so cute at gatherings and the like.
Despite the time away from the rest of her body, Dolly retains a positive outlook and feels the trip will be good for her breasts, who work nonstop day in and day out as PR managers.
I think it’ll be good for them to get out of the house for awhile.
Dolly Parton’s breasts will be making appearances all day at Old Country Lodgings in Dallas on the 15th, The Hoot ‘N’ Hollar Inn in Houston on the 16th, and Willie Nelson’s Trailer in Amarillo on the 16th, an event that will also feature a small concert from rising Country underground music group the Udders.
