Hollywood Gossip and Political Hoopla

There’s like a foot of snow outside my house this morning. The weather channel said 3-5 inches. I demand LAYOFFS and FIRINGS.

I was wrong about News Years Eve in Hollywood, sorta. Turns out something scandalous did occur. Remotely scandalous anyway. Lindsay Lohan made out with three men in one night and took one of them home with her.

Jesus CHRIST Pat Buchanan is balding.

Sorry for that distraction. No, Pat Buchanan was not one of the three men that Lindsay Lohan frenched with, though that would have been an indefinitely more interesting turn of events. She practically dry humped on a couch with a random waiter, made out with some actor I’ve never heard of, and then was all over some other guy who’s the son of an italian music legend that again, I’ve never heard of. That might’ve been the one she took home to the hotel. All in all, a better pull I suppose than Paris Hilton who had Kevin Federline and probably that Wizard of Oz Oompa Loompa fellow she saved awhile back.

Nothing about her drinking though. I’m shocked her sobriety has lasted.

I’ve got MSNBC on right now. Hardball is on with Chris Matthews, Pat Buchanan and KD Lang and the three are screaming bloody murder about something. What? I dunno. I think it’s illegal immigration but they’re all yelling over each other. It’s been going on for five minutes. I’m sure the aim of the show isn’t to make me wish I had been born deaf but I’ll be damned in they’re not seriously making me consider putting a pencil eraser in my ear just like my momma told me not to do when I was a little boy.

I caught more Lou Dobbs last week and have done a 180 after being greatly amused by him the first time around. He’s quite an arrogant guy, arrogant to the point where I feel like I’m sitting there watching him strut around in some kind of solo homemade sex tape telling me how huge his wee wee is. Everything from his smile as he unapologetically shills his book to that twinkle in his eye when he starts talking about how the world wants him to run as an independent but he just loves his job too much to do it. Just couldn’t take it anymore, and I ended up turning him off before he got to the money shot.

My late after viewing habits are going to change starting tomorrow. No more Hardball or any other of this new talk show BS. I won’t even have to see the first five minutes of the ever expanding Tucker Carlson before my lazy ass realizes it’s time to change the channel. I’m sending myself to television rehab and moving on. Today’s all about changes.